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When I was 15, I had a boyfriend who I loved so dearly- we were very much in love, but by the time we were graduating from high school, I became deeply troubled because of family problems (my father's unfaithfulness), I guess I probably became bitter & not trusting, I could not even open up to him from shame. Out of the blue, my boyfriend dropped me like a piece of dirty linen- I was so hurt, I did not even try to patch things up, it has taken me so long to get over the hurt, I thought I would be forever in love with him, but thankfully, after 15 years, I am now married to a wonderful, loving man. My only problem is, I keep on dreaming about this other guy, even when I do not think of him, & it bothers me a lot because it brings the past, & all the hurt come back like fresh wound. I have started talking to my ex ,on a friendly note, nothing personal, he just got married last January, but we never talk about the past, like the "we", we were before do not exist,I really do not mind, but one thing I would like is to talk to him about it, why he hurt me , which was so out of character, being that I felt I knew him so well. Please give me some advice- will it make sense to dig up the past for my peace of mind, I want to resolve this conflict within me, I feel like I'm betraying my husband, lastly, I do not want to hurt anybody especially his wife.I do not want him back, but I want to have my questions answered ? Thank you very, very much. Happy Mother's Day (if it applies)
"X"
Let this go! A first crush (at 15, it is NOT love) is never forgotten, especially if it ends due to outside circumstances. But your first relationship was half a lifetime ago and both of you have moved on. You both have new special love relationships which are your first concerns. At least, I'm assuming your husband is your first concern!
There is nothing to be gained by a "heart-to-heart" with your former friend and everything to lose.
Also, remember that guilt (you mentioned feeling like you are betraying your husband) is usually your conscience talking!
"Boomer"
You want an answer: "You were fifteen!" There is probably no deep, symbolic or psychological explanation for the route your relationship took
with this teen love. If you feel like talking about "things," that's fine, but what's bugging you probably has nothing to do with this ex, so
I'd leave him out of it. Dreams can have millions of interpretations, certainly the best interpretations are made by the dreamer herself, but perhaps discussing your confusion with a close girlfriend or professional might direct your energy toward a more accurate source.